The Giver

In this time of friendship and love, we all have those friends who give more than they receive. This young lady was taught as a child to always give more than you get.

She looks at herself as the friend that will always be there... even when she says she's done with a situation. A giving heart and determined mind has gotten her to where she is today, growing.

She grew up in a small town with great older siblings and a strong family with lots of love and faith. She says she has always known her place and how to help others, even when "there's nothing to be done." She knows when to butt into people's business and when to stand on the sidelines.

This young lady knows how to give it and take it, but like all people, she's human, and cannot be a giver all the time.

As a giver, she does not always realize that you can be depleted. When the shelves are empty, they need to be restocked. She recently told me she goes into what she calls hibernation when she feels depleted. After a few days of "hibernation", she's ready to plan the next party or listen to another friend's ordeal.

Even though she doesn't hear the appreciation all the time from her friends, she knows they care. Sometimes the depletion can be filled with a little spoken gratitude or giving reciprocation. She would never tell someone she's helping that she needs that in return, but doesn't everyone need a little pat on the back?

She doesn't let her mask of positivity fall very often, but when it does, it hits the floor... and hard. She's extremely selective with who she shows her true self to, and getting this much from her was telling of her personality in the best sense.

She told me some stories of a few of her friends and how they've asked for her advice. While she's more than happy to listen and give her opinion, she said, "I have the least going on in my life, so why do you think I would be the one to give advice?" As she said this, I could see the immense hurt in her eyes. She has given all that she has to those she cares about, but rarely gets asked how she's feeling. However, when she is asked how things are going with her, she brushes it off and says everything is fine. She said her issues are not meant to be put on others.

She is selfless in more ways than one, and rarely asks to vent about her "minor problems." She knows there are people far worse off than she is, so there's no need to fret about things others cannot change for her.

She is by far one of the best people I know. However she knows one day, she will have to voice her opinions and let everyone around her know what she stands for.

There are people pleasers and there are givers. It seems like a very fine line, but there is a huge difference. People pleasers tell people what they want to hear and give them what they think they want. Givers listen when it's needed, give without thought of return, and continue to put others before themselves. Extreme givers keep their personal lives to themselves, unless they have a friend or two that knows how to crack the outer shell. Those friends for the giver, are considered the best friends and even more generous than the giver could ever imagine... even if they, the friend, do not consider themselves that way.

After spending more time than I have in a long time with this incredible young woman, I have realized to appreciate and check in with my friends more. Everyone is a giver in their own way. Take a moment and think of a friend in your life that may keep to themselves or give more than they seem to receive.

As my college philosophy teacher once said, "The reason to life is to give life meaning." (I aced the class... don't worry!)

** This young lady has asked for me to not reveal her name. Privacy is key in this world.

Coming into the Blogging World

There are so many negative things and people in the world right now, I think it's time for a bit of positivity. There are so many people right outside your door who have changed this world for the better. Personally, I have a list about a mile long of people that I want to know everything about!

Not only have these people changed their lives for the better, they've improved the world a little bit by their existance. Having people like this in your life not only makes you a better person, but spreads to those around you.

We NEED positivity more than anything else in the world. Get ready for a whirlwind of good people with challenging pasts and even brighter futures.